UVA Hospital: Day One

As many of you know, I am checked into the Epilepsy Monitoring Unit at the University of Virginia hospital. In brief, after several years and half a dozen or so medication changes, I just don't feel good. I'm tired all of the time, my memory is not what it should be, and I'm unable to live the life I want or fully enjoy the life that I have. After a "quality of life" discussion with my local neurologist and reaching an understanding that medications are unusually complicated for me, he referred me to the epilepsy specialists at the University of Virginia.

So here I am.

The trip here was beautiful. Floyd drove me up here in my Taurus and mapquest's fastest route involved driving past quaint towns, on scenic byways, and past stunning landscapes like rocky crags near Old Ragtop Mountain. It was glorious! Parking at the hospital was a rather abyssmal end to the otherwise lovely drive. There was one garage that was packed, but the lady in front of us was driving crazy. She pulled into a ridiculously narrow spot between two long trucks and came a sliver away from ramming one truck's bumper. Oh so close. We drove up for what felt like a dozen levels before we scored an uber spot on the same aisle as the stairwell. But really, parking here was traumatic!! Even Floyd commented that it would have been soooo much better to have Mom driving with her handicap parking tag. Yes, I'll admit it, I would have mooched her phat parking priviledges.

Once I got here, I was funneled to the EEG lab on the basement of the primary care center, where they hooked up a bunch of electrodes to my scalp. The process involves measuring my skull, marking a bunch of Xs in red all over my head. The technician had to deal with my very long hair, and told me that the EEG tehnicians all fight over the bald men! After marking me up, she scrubbed each spot with a sandpapery liquid that she said (a) removed the outer layer of skin and (b) removed natural oils fromthe scalp. Then she stuck a pile of glue and conductive paste on each spot, applied the electrode, and dried it using a super super cold air blower. I then had a 20 minute EEG to get a base reading, which involves laying still, hyperventilating, and a strobe light. Afterwards, a neurologist gave me a physical. She really enjoyed using the reflex thingum on my left knee, which was not as anxious to reflex as my right!

On to the epilepsy ward I went, where they wanted to put an IV in my forearm. That sounded painful to me so we went with my hand. We had to choose a hand. I was trying to figure out whether my left or right hand was less critical for gaming, but the tech said, "Which hand do you wipe with?" *quiet pause* She won. I'll be honest - the IV frickin hurt. It felt like the vein in my hand was going to burst!! A little bit later I had to give away four vials of blood. Floyd walked away for a little bit whilst I was pumping up the vials. I can't blame him. I would have walked away too if I could.

Speaking of walking away, I am tethered to my bed. I have a box hanging around my neck into which the EEG lines feed, and that box is connected to an industrial strength black cable which connects to the recording/transmitting equipment. The tether was stuck around my little table on wheels but Floyd was kind enough to unravel it so that I could go pee. A note with regard to peeing here, I have another blog in the works for that topic alone!!

Floyd left before dark at my insistence to make his drive home easier, as the poor lad has to work this week. I almost fell asleep but fought it, because I didn't want to miss dinner, which consisted of chicken (too thick for me to eat - I like my meat thin), a roll, iced tea, and a smattering of corn and what I *think* was kale. The best part was the fresh sliced strawberry at the bottom of my yogurty-granola dessert. As you might guess, I am soooooo hungry right now. Soooooooo hungry!! I am ravenously looking forward to my cheerio breakfast!!!

A few other notes. I am visited by a nurse about once every two hours. I was given a gigantic 32 ounce sippy cup of water which has a locked lid. Thr sides of my bed stay up and are covered with padding. The room is a bit warm. I have a sock with a thumb hole cut in it over my hand to keep the IV from accidentally tearing out. And, I have three wristbands. One with my name. One classifying me as a fall risk (BRIGHT YELLOW) and one noting that I have medication allergies (FIREHOUSE RED). Sigh. We'll
see how things go tomorrow after the doctors review my first night's data!